A Dinner with a Senior

I had dinner with a senior today. His mind was sharp, so he spoke quickly and switched between topics with ease. Thanks to that, even though we only chatted for about 50 minutes, we covered a lot of ground.

The first interesting topic was the “postgraduate recommendation class” — a privileged class whose students are guaranteed admission to graduate school without taking the entrance exam. What should be expected of the students in it? More research? Maybe. So we discussed what kind of arrangements would make that possible. A really bad situation is when most students fail to plan well, for many reasons: too many possibilities and too much confusion. He suggested that perhaps we should “push” the students, as Zhiyuan College at Shanghai Jiao Tong University (SJTU) does. Intense coursework enables students to learn and, more importantly, to complete something through dedication.

Then came the second question: what has been bothering me these days? I answered: increasingly intractable mathematics and a more tired body and mind, which lead to less concentration, less discipline, and daily discouragement. He then began to question me Socratically. What do I really care about? What is my core driving force? Do I like research? Do I want to take a gap year? How much money would it take to “buy” me, or to let me take a gap year? How would I use the money? If he gave me 2 million yuan, what would I do with it? Invest it, or start a business? After several rounds, I realized that many of my answers revealed that I was always skirting around certain topics. He said I always refuse to think much about real-world affairs — matters like entrepreneurship, or truly handling concrete affairs that involve large sums of money. In some sense, my caring so much about studying and research is a reflection of that.

He also raised another interesting point: what do I truly want? If I have a big dream $X_1$, I should start from a small $X_0$ and move toward $X_1$ step by step.

Then we talked about relationships. What makes a good relationship? Not one that merely exchanges information. A real, good relationship is one where we can work together to solve a real problem — like collaborating at a hackathon.

Finally, we talked about passing down experience and knowledge across generations. He suggested that newcomers could try buying seniors a coffee. He thought this could even be made into a business, which I disagreed with. Still, I think his core idea was right. So if anyone wants to connect with me, just reach out! We can share a meal or play some one-on-one basketball. And if you’re willing to treat me to a meal or a coffee, even better!